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Reality does not always match up with fantasy.
My fantasy, once I finally sold my first novel, was that I would print my book in hard copy (which I never do) and carry it out of my office and go somewhere with it—maybe a coffee shop!
I would sit at a table in a coffee shop and read my manuscript on real paper with a red pen in hand and review it with care, while sipping my coffee, thoughtfully editing a chapter or two a day until I was confident that everything was to my complete satisfaction.
Right. I have finally started working on the first major edits with a wonderful editor who lives in L.A. She is smart and experienced and no-nonsense, and she gives me lots and lots of notes—and a one-week deadline to fix them all.
It’s more work than I imagined and a lot more stress. Leisurely trips to the coffee shop are out of the question. Sleeping full nights and getting regular meals are in doubt. I had no idea what to expect because this is, in fact, my very first rodeo.
“Can’t you ask for an extension?” someone asked and, of course, I cannot. I do not want to disappoint this hardworking editor who has taken the time to write all these notes. So, I work in my office, often until quite late.
Her notes appear in little bubbles at the side of the text. “This is reading like a sermon,” a note said.
This was a puzzling observation because the passage she was referring to was, in fact, a sermon. But I gathered from the note that sounding like a sermon (even if it was a sermon) was not a good thing.
So, I cut the sermon. It is now a very short sermon. If you were in church, you might think the pastor had come up short of ideas or there was a football game scheduled to start shortly, but that’s OK. There’s no reason we can’t get to the point a little faster.
But much more often—probably because I write a 600-word column every week—she wants me to write more. “Can you tell us more?” she asks. Of course, I can always write more, but it takes time, and I only have a week. There is no coffee shop in sight.
I had forgotten about my coffee shop fantasy entirely until yesterday, when I was taking a walk. (I still try to get some exercise during all of this.) It had finally warmed up enough, and the sidewalk was full of people sitting at little round tables, either reading or having important- sounding conversations. I felt a little jealous. And then I felt silly.
Because I am doing what I’ve been fantasizing about for so long. It just doesn’t look exactly like I thought it would. So, I made a promise to myself right then and there.
I will celebrate when I hit “send” on the next set of revisions. I will celebrate when I have written new words, when my editor gives me a thumbsup, when I’ve made a small thing better. The big moments go by too fast, and they are almost never the way I imagine them. But the small moments are happening every day, one after another, and they can be whatever I choose to make them.
Someday, I will have a coffee in that shop I walk by—with or without a manuscript—and I will have a small and perfect celebration—over nothing at all. Till next time, Carrie Photos and other things can be found on Facebook at CarrieClassonAuthor
