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From the Citizen Archives: Winter 2023 Colorado County Mag
The start of a new year always comes with a renewed sense of purpose and energy. People all around the country spend time reflecting on the events and the growth they experienced during the prior year. In the same spirit, many also consider any shortcomings or improvements they’d like to see in themselves.
People create New Year’s resolutions for themselves as goals to help correct personality or physical traits they determined need work. Unfortunately, many of the resolutions fall short or lose their luster as the year unfolds.
Maybe you’re on a diet, but the milkshakes you deemed unappealing on Jan. 1 start to look more inviting by mid-February. Maybe it’s the fitness guru whose two-a-day workouts at the start of the year became more like once-in-awhiles as the months progress.
It seems many aren’t very resolved after all, and these New Year’s resolutions become more of a holiday tradition rather than a commitment to self-betterment. The goals are more like passing wishes rather than a mission based on ambition.
But how can people bring some true resolve to their resolutions as they aspire for self-improvement? While there are many different reasons as to why individuals fall short of their goals, many get affected by a combination of factors.
For one, the attitude behind what leads to these resolutions can often come from a negative place. The objectives themselves can be positive changes a person wants to make, but many times these are made to correct some of our least-favorite traits. We are often our own biggest critics without even realizing that we are being so hard on ourselves.
Accomplishments are downplayed, and mistakes or flaws are magnified in one’s thoughts with the mind itself being the sole bearer of that burden. So many resolutions are made to change things people “hate” about themselves, which already creates a negative impact on the true motivations of their goals.
Having a more positive frame of mind even when regarding your own shortcomings is an effective way to create higher levels of self-love and decrease any self-loathing. When goals are created by a person who loves himself or herself but can still acknowledge areas where he or she falls short, those goals can become more like constructive criticism rather than brutal self-bullying Try being kinder to yourself in your own thoughts and develop a sense of appreciation foreven the traits you consider flaws. Goals based in self-love can make you less stressed when chasing them and cause less emotional damage from shortcomings. Creating good, positive goals is the first step to actually reaching them.
Once you have your goals set, the process of reaching those dreams becomes the next grueling part of the journey.
A big reason people fall short of their resolutions is they set goals at a level that seems intimidating. Setting a goal such as losing 50 or more pounds sounds like a great idea that will improve your life, but the day-to-day struggle of such a lifestyle change can make that objective seem unattainable - especially if progress doesn’t come quickly.
The easiest solution to overcoming a difficult challenge is to create smaller goals to reach along the way. An individual looking to lose those 50 pounds in a year has to lose less than 5 pounds per month to achieve his or her mission. Thinking of your goals in the short term as easily achievable (in comparison in the big ones) can help relieve the overwhelming sense of chasing an insurmountable challenge white adding motivation to reach the next goal after accomplishing something positive The mental satisfaction of reaching each small step adds to the drive to continue on to the next one. Sooner than later, that individual will have taken so many small steps toward the goal he or she won’t even realize that they’re knocking on the front door to their ultimate prize. A study by psychology professor Dr. Gail Matthews determined that those who write down their goals and the individual actions - or steps to reach those goals were much likelier to actually achieve them.
This meticulous method works fine for anybody trying to make tangible changes in their life that can be measured including weight loss, building muscle mass etc.
But what about those who try to make even deeper unseen changes regarding their personalities or demeanor? It’s harder to simply track how much progress they’ve made regarding their temperment. There are no visual checkpoints to tell you if you are becoming a friendlier person, so how can people with those types of goals still give themselves the motivation to stick to their efforts?
For someone chasing any type of goal, he or she must create a sense of urgency that lights a fire under their feet. Urgency is not panic, it’s simply the understanding the intended goal is vital and worth doing no matter what it takes (within reason).
Motivation comes from the mind, and sometimes you may have to create scenarios or trick yourself into creating that sense of urgency in your head.
Hall of Fame basketball player Michael Jordan revealed during his documentary, “The Last Dance” that he adopted a similar mindset every night to reach his goal of winning. To create a sense of urgency for himself to dominate each possession and win the game, he would find, or make up, any reason for him to have an emotional charge behind his performance. Even creating a fictitious scenario of being scorned or done wrong by someone on the other team would give Jordan the mental motivation to dominate his opponents with no mercy.
Creating e sense of urgency doesn’t have to be directly tied to competition. It can be as simple as giving yourself a minor consequence for failing one of your day-to-day steps towards your goal. Something like, “If I don’t go on my walk today, I can’t watch my favorite show when it comes on later” could be enough to inspire a person to get walking, so long as he or she holds himself or herself accountable enough to follow through if they fall short.
For some people, the situation itself should be enough to create a sense of urgency: “I don’t fix my attitude, I’ll push away my family.” by Urgent thinking creates the drive to make a change sooner rather than later, especially when there are high stakes.
At the end of the day, the main factor that brings everything together is a sense of accountability. Without the ability to bold yourself accountable or without a dependable person who fills that role, it’s difficult to commit yourself to anything. Accountability is taking responsibility for yourself and your actions regardless of the positives or negatives that come from them Can you admit to yourself when you’re doing things to harm your ability in reach your goal? Do you have someone to remind you of your goals when you start to waver? Can you get yourself back to doing the right things when you fall off your intended path?
These are questions that often get answered during the process of achieving aspirations, and sometimes the answers can determine whether the fight continues at all or if the dream dies.
This early in the year, everyone has the same chance to make their mark and decide how they want the rest of the year to go. As with every new year, several people will make the decision to improve or change an element of themselves or their lifestyle in the form of resolutions. The hope is that each person will have the resolve to stick to these resolutions and make aimpact on themselves and the community around them.
